Tuna Fishcakes

I ate some good tuna fishcakes at a friend’s place. She really went out of her way to host us for a lunch preparing many dishes with love and care. Even went out of her way to greet us in a traditional Indian manner which was a bit over the top but fun.

Especially considering we weren’t expecting anything like that for a simple lunch with friends. I shot the video of some of the foods that she had made and understood much of her time was spent in the kitchen. I understood some of the other problems she faced with raising a daughter- the changes in her life now as she took on her parenting roles.

She’s not unique- there are others too like her, all over the world. But she’s a friend who shared some things openly and she was there sometimes when I needed her the most. She was the one who had a big problem with my smoking but we didn’t stop being friends. She just simply told me in multiple ways that her child comes first. I see that as a truth in most of the people I have met.

So I decided to try to make the tuna fishcakes later to try to replicate the taste or make my own version of it.

Tuna fishcakes from a Man’s POV

End of the day when you don’t have a parent and your husband abandons you, when you are sick and unhealthy, what do you do? You just divorce the man, and you seek a house, employment, a new family, a new set of friend’s circle, a whole set of things you need for a nest somewhere on this planet earth, recover your health, fitness as well and you do all of this by yourself. And this is financed from the little money you saved while you worked and slaved on a person who left you with nothing in hand. Wonderful, isn’t it?

He worked to save more money and become a slave for others who protected their families. These others then wipe off all responsibility by writing a paycheck for the next month. He chose to do that, you see. But you my dear are the idiot here and hence not worthy of employment as anything despite your 18+ years of work experience.

He’s a man- unencumbered. He is the only son of parents who are unencumbered having done this twice already. We are trying to show you the lighter side of things- but you refuse to see that. At the ripe age of let’s say you look like 50+ you are trying to be employed now?

Tuna Fishcakes from a Woman’s POV

You spent now 3 years trying to fight this battle on different grounds. Wow- you are a cook and perhaps you need to find a driver to lie down with you because you seem like such a nasty piece of work to me.

Perhaps you are frustrated, depressed or simply a jealous woman who is trying to be vindictive. (Really, that’s all you got?)

But that’s the beauty of a gift of love. Food cooked with love, recipe shared, some ideas picked up for trying to make my own little nest more comfortable and some heartfelt sharing of regular everyday life for us women.

Somewhere, I feel obliged to share that with others in my own way. It can never be the same.

So, this is not meant as an insult or a form of flattery. It’s simply my way of sharing the love that I received from many of you ladies. If you see it as hatred instead of love, then I guess your software version was different from mine.

When I overcommunicate on this aspect, some people get annoyed. But it’s ok. I won’t live forever and neither will they.

Why use Tuna?

Any firm boneless fish will do actually. Big fish like Katla, Barramundi or Tuna are what I am more familiar with myself. Or Salmon also works.

I have used Dory fish at times because it was easily available and tends to be practically tasteless. When we use spices with the fish, you can’t really make out what fish it is at the end of the day. The taste is good, if you cook it with love and are careful to follow the process.

I have never tried making it with cod fish. So I tasted a cod fishcake when I went out on a walk in Manhattan.

Curiosity killed the cat. No, I didn’t like it in a fishcake. Preferred it fried straight up with the simple spices that I had the night before.

Sometimes the spices may get burnt. Sometimes you are impatient and don’t dry up the fishy mixture. Then it will be difficult to bind it, and you spend a lot of time fixing things.

Fixing the mix is often the most difficult part of the job and sometimes the most joyful part.

Tuna Fishcakes are easy

You can use fresh, frozen or canned tuna. They are plenty around and you can just mix it with some potatoes as well to help with the binding.

Can you make the fish cake without cooking it much?

Yes, you can with some boiled potatoes, dried spices and fresh herbs. You can also add a bit of cheese if you like it which will give you a completely different flavor mix.

Up to the point of making the patties, you don’t even need to use a fire stove if that’s a problem for you. But baking, shallow frying or roasting the cakes does need some fire/heat.

Whether you coat it with breadcrumbs or not, is a matter of choice. It tastes much better with the breadcrumbs but then some people have a problem with gluten. You can even get gluten free crumbs, but others have a problem with crumbs in particular.

Breadcrumbed or coated fishcakes usually soak up a bit more of the oil they are fried in- so that’s another thing to consider. The more things you add- the more calorie laden it tends to be. That’s information that you can choose to ignore if that’s not an important consideration.

Raw Fish Cakes

While I was discussing making the fishcakes there was an alternate suggestion implied with tuna sushi bought from the stores. I think the point was, why are you wasting time cooking?

I said many times, I love sushi. No problem with it.

Nagging little voice somewhere- Oh, you are a champion of raw fruits now suddenly. You wish to become a fruit eating bat? Brilliant. You want to emulate Steve Jobs and then cite cases of his impossible and unhealthy behaviors later.

Each of you who pursued something, remember that you did it at the cost of others. And then you abandoned that pursuit and went to deride and laugh at the same later. So, here’s my ode to fishcakes made out of tuna- Mercury, go take a hike.

You were so busy admiring your own stealth and wit that you never saw that everybody laughs at their own silliness. Someday. Somehow. Even the poorest of poor wits when at wit’s end understands that he/she/it is not infallible.

The danger in people who make fishcakes silently without discussing with you is that you don’t really know what’s going into it. So those of you who call people control freaks while watching others hawk eyed; sit and observe what goes into that fishcake.

Unfortunately, that’s really not required unless you wish to make it yourself. And why would you bother to cook anything unless it is meant to be eaten.

So, for example, you are a cat who wants to declare I have no use for fishcakes. And if I want, I can make it or buy it myself. Or better yet, sit silently, put multiple objections till the other person feels compelled to make it.

Roasting Fishcakes

In the end, one may end up being exasperated with the multiple objections and decide to skip it altogether. Perhaps you are being bullied in your own way by those who have their own traumatic experiences in life. Some bullied people become bigger bullies in life. (Takes one to know one, just saying.)

Sometimes, I am really tired. Here’s my overriding advice to those who may empathise with my situation.

Look for fish which are deemed to have less of mercury. So, for example, katla/carp/barramundi which doesn’t have too much of mercury.

Buy boneless fillets then to save time if you can, otherwise you may have to deal with disposing off the bones.

Somebody gets annoyed with the time it takes to cook fishcakes and wants everything to be done in 15mins flat. Ignore them.

Somebody else wants to offload their stress on to you by telling you how the stove was not cleaned properly while you were cooking the fish. Or perhaps you didn’t throw the bones in the right dustbin. How about the eternal problem of forgetting to wear sanitized disposable gloves while cooking?

But then, have you calculated the impact on planet earth while you consumed so much of unnecessary garbage to simply appear to be a better person?

Shut out the noise. Just make the fishcakes.

Eating the fucking Fishcake

Now, eating anything cooked with love is a problem for you.

You would much rather buy it from somewhere else- perhaps a prepacked and frozen package from a supermarket.

Better yet, you can simply visit a restaurant and order it or order something else. Eat yourself peacefully and smile at strangers beautifully. You don’t have to see them tomorrow. Just pay the bill, use comforting and compassionate words, give a small/big tip and leave silently.

In fact, now I suggest leaving a bigger tip if the food is bad.

Case in point the little joint in Harlem where I bought the codcake. Because the staff has to eat it every day. This pondering over the tip is a new problem added during my travels. (Psst! I didn’t eat the fishcake there you see, so I left the tip just like that without much thought- rounding it up).

In many countries I know, a standard tip is added to the bill to save time and mental energy. You are encouraged not to spend time thinking about other people. Limit your circle of thought and influence to organizations (lawful or unlawful ones).

Because, personal life is same as professional life, that’s what I’m told now. It’s highly confusing- so I become a recluse to seek my inner world.

Who wants to wage a war over food? This is a funny statement for every mother or father for that matter. Oh, you are neither.

Then you get away with being the way you are- whatever way you wish to describe that!

Making a Career out of eating Fishcake

Oh, you made a career out of lampooning others? Make a career out of eating fishcakes now.

You screamed at people for a piece of ginger or sharp spice in the fishcake? And then felt nothing about another who had a bone stuck in his/her throat.

You then sang songs about the cruelty to animals and other men/women. Well, I see through your innumerable tricks to try to justify your own cruelties.

You find other’s cruelties so unbearable, look into the mirror each day and remember your own later in life. You found dad jokes so funny and laughed at other’s miseries.

See that first in the men around you. You laughed at women’s miseries- go and see the women in your life suffer. That’s the fate that awaits any of you who is smug enough in life to talk about your trauma while refusing to see others.

After all of that reflection- you just go and throw the fishcakes into the dustbin. That’s all. (Wow)

Words around kindness with Zero Actions

Why would you poison kindness, unless you have a very twisted mind in the first place. Or perhaps you are an idiot, as every person who is an idiot wishes to identify in others.

You are what you see in others. If I see no love and care, that means, I am not loving or caring?!? This is the way I understand the universe works. I may be wrong. But there’s no harm in putting it out there.

“Can you see a heart sign here?” I asked the lady.

“Well, only from a certain angle.” she said.

I may be seeing a mask instead- remember Black Panther. (V fishy)

Does it make you look and feel smarter now, that you have shunned the words, the fishcake and the process of eating/cooking it yourself?

Really, the lengths to which some people will go to hide their own weaknesses is beyond a human’s capability to unmask. So, we have technology to help us with it now. And yet it may fail.

HONY, I shrunk the kids.

Ohhhhh, you are able to do that with humans as well without any feelings/compassion. Wow. You have reached the pinnacle of asceticism it seems.

You have deluded yourself with so much of dope, hope, drinks and shit that you now think that you are a godlike creature capable of so much more in life.

Dust you are and dust you shall be.

How do I explain that I see my parents in the land that I walk on. (It’s not the same illusion/trick for everyone). And some others see them walking on water or fire.

Sometimes, you can use a bubble making toy instead. (I can be mean too).

Adding some egg wash to Fishcake

Hansel and Gretel saw the wicked witch and decided that this is no fairytale.

After much deliberation, I have decided to coat the fishcake with breadcrumbs. And deep fry them with a lot of oil spillage all over the place. Somebody will need to clean it up. And the smell will overpower those with a delicate sensibility.

In fact, even fragrant candles or diffusers won’t work now. Landlords, landladies, fellow tenants and cops may need to be called- perhaps even the fire station. Eviction notices were sent earlier for cockroaches and pest control agents were called as well. Yet the hint is not being taken.

This fat cat is refusing to budge from the seat of no-good work. Villany has no limits when it comes to fishy tales related to fishcakes.

In fact, now I am tempted to add some grated cheese on top of everything else. How about mozzarella? No. That’s too clingy/sticky and I may need to show my teeth. So, I will make it some unknown cheese instead. What fun.

Now, someone will try to throw a spanner in the works asking stupid questions like, have you earned it? Bland truth. No, I haven’t.

But I spotted light/water particles in the air this morning. That’s the kind of vision I have. Do you, have it? No?

Okkkkkk….this will be one tough Friday.

Chicken or Duck Eggs for Fishcakes?

We were running for cover when we saw rats in the park. And I remembered to check whether there was an allergic reaction to any kind of eggs.

Duck eggs, robin eggs, chicken eggs, human eggs, larvae from the insect world? It seems every kind of egg may lead to an aversion or allergic reaction from some people. Perhaps, its already time to move to the forests and return after a certain number of years.

If all of us grew up on stories like this, can we make the time period flexible or is that governed by forces larger than us? I would like to understand this further because, I have a problem with specificity to that degree.

Mathematics maybe somebody’s stronger suit. Reminds me of certain camps. You know the sorts where people are huddled up for a purpose of sacrificing for some purported larger cause?

Oh, you don’t know what I am talking about. Ouch.

I must have missed filling that in the form while I was visiting gardens and museums. Are we talking about physical forms, mental forms, spiritual forms, heavenly manual forms? What kind of forms?

Oh, you said dorms, not forms. My bad.

Now, I hear the buzz of Hotel California in the background.

That was actually the lawnmower being used by a person who believes in God almighty. He gets paid to believe that I think. Or perhaps he believes because of others who get paid. Perhaps they don’t even need to be paid. They just believe. And everything happens magically. 🙂

Are you volunteering this free information? Yes, why not. There’s enough and more useless people with useless information in this world, as I see it.

The Strength of Common Enemy- Fishcakes

Have you been missing a villain in your lives? Lo and behold, we have these Fishcakes now. Solves many problems to give you something to play with today. Perhaps gives you all some fodder for conversation and gossip for a few more days to justify your existence on Planet Earth.

But last week you told me the villain was dairy?

Ah, that German lab mistook you for a Golden Retriever – you just turned your back to the Snitch ball. It was a furball which was coughed up after multiple hacks.

I am so good, because I eat fishcakes or because I do not eat fishcakes. Because I made fishcakes or because I do not make fishcakes. I am even better because I do not utter a word and observe others making or eating fishcakes or talking about fishcakes.

I managed to imagine a luxury car, bag, human, sporting medal or a rock concert which impacted the lives of billions of people while you wasted your breath explaining about fishcakes. Anything goes.

You call yourself a creator? I am the creator. Let’s get really obnoxiously loud now which will make others cower and us less likeable.

We got a high out of a purported success or a low out of a failure while you blandly spent your day making fishcakes. We had fun watching a film, reading a book or planting seeds for a garden while you were making nasty fishcakes.

I say, meoooooooow. And I am a bitch as well. How does that work, moron?

You were just looking to get employment elsewhere and perhaps you landed a job with a fat paycheck.

Trusting your instinct about Fishcakes

You dumped all your shit on me, and you still didn’t feel good? Did you check whether you are a bird or not?

C’mon, works for you. No? We have tales about bird droppings being auspicious. These are stories we tell kids crying in the playground.

Seeing someone else joyful, angry, sad, disgusted, placid or fearful makes you what? Check that out first. Because human emotions are the basic units of precious energy in this particular weird alternate universe.

1. You are burning humans for your life energy. Some are eager to go faster- you use them.
2. A few are your own flesh and blood- you use them. What does that make you?
3. You decided to preserve your own flesh and blood by using up other humans. What does that make you?
4. You decided to preserve animals or trees by using up humans. What does that make you?
5. You decided to preserve statues, monuments, buildings, objects, symbols and other artefacts by using up humans. What does that make you?
6. You decided to run away and not pursue this line of thinking to its logical conclusion. What does that make you?

I finally conclude- it’s just a piece of peace. A piece of cake for some. You get me? 🙂

Footnote

Foiling tuna fishcakes

Trusting another is as much a mistake

As mistrusting

Depends how much energy you have

I have lots of water while you have fire

Throw an egg and it may cause some ire

With the little creatures who live

In small and big Shropshire

Hence, we put many round circles

To ensure there is some comic relief

For those who do a lot of song and dance around belief

I want to foil your fishcake

You getting a compliment in any which way

Disturbs somebody in April or May

Did you not get this as you do your Sway?

We are all only humans- use me, I said many times

Like that toilet paper you hoarded

You were just looking for a punching bag

Yes, you miss your mother so much

You lying scheming old hag.

Melting Lemon Drop 26. 07. 2025